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»Wiffle Ball Advance
"A strikeout analogy would be far too kind for this game."
This is quite possibly the worst portable game
I’ve ever played. Wiffle Ball Advance is just unbelievably horrible.
It’s like the gap between a game of professional baseball and a
two-person game of Wiffle Ball, except instead of the better thing
being the height of its field, replace professional baseball with “an
average game.” Wiffle Ball Advance is the ultimate example of a game
thrown together with no effort just to capitalize on the less informed
consumers who will be attracted to the game’s non-threatening image.
There’s just nothing redeeming about this game in any area, from the
gameplay to the effort of the developers.
Wiffle Ball Advance is similar to a baseball game in setup, you can
play a single game or go into a season mode, and choose between
“teams”, if you can call them that. As far as I can tell there are only
two people on each team, but that’s the main theme of the game, cutting
as much as possible out of baseball. You can’t have multiple people on
base; there are two outs per inning, seven innings per game, and no
fielding beyond trying to catch the ball. This was most likely done to
make the game resemble real Wiffle Ball more closely; emulating the
lack of resources most kids would have trying to start a baseball like
game on a whim. The fact is, however, that this is a video game and the
whole point of games is to let you do things without having to follow
the laws of your immediate reality. Crippling the game was a bad idea
regardless of the reason, why would you want to play a baseball game
where the ball hitting the ground just counts as a single-homerun based
on where it landed?
Not that it comes up much. The balance between batting and fielding in
this game is broken to a truly absurd extent. I’ve played entire games
where there wasn’t a single base taken (if the score is tied at the end
of the 7th inning you don’t go into extras, the match is just counted
as a tie). Having only one character in the field may sound like it
would make fielding hard, but considering the incredibly slow speed of
the ball and your character’s disproportionately giant size compared to
the field, catching the ball takes pretty much no effort. The only
scoring that ever happened when I was playing was when the computer hit
automatic home runs. Of course, part of that was the terrible batting
control. Would you believe I actually had to look in the instruction
manual to figure out how to get the CPU to pitch to me? Turns out you
have to hold down the button that makes you wind up your bat for about
three seconds, at which point the computer finally gets the hint and
pitches. The hit detection is horrible: I hit the ball maybe 5% of the
time. There is a batting box, but it doesn’t mean anything as far as I
can tell. The ball never actually reaches you; it just goes into the
box and disappears, counting as a strike. There is no way to get the
timing down, it’s just blind luck. Playing the game is basically
striking out and a if you’re lucky getting a hit which the computer
easily catches, and then pitching to the computer which will hit every
time it swings, and then easily catching every ball it hits. There is
nothing even resembling enjoyable gameplay, it’s a chore and nothing
else.
Wiffle Ball Advance isn’t as bad in graphics and sound as in other
areas, but it’s definitely not strong in them either. The graphics are
about average for DS, the bottom screen shows cartoony sprites while
the top screen shows plain polygon graphics. You get some different
play areas like at school and in a backyard. The graphics being almost
average is sadly the highpoint of the game. The sound and sound effects
are typical baseball/kid’s game stuff, nothing you’ll remember. There
really isn’t much to say about the graphics or sound.
Replay value is non-existent. I probably wouldn’t have finished a
single game if I didn’t have to for the purpose of reviewing, hardly
anyone will have the desire/patience to even get to the point where you
finish Wiffle Ball Advance, let alone want to replay it. There aren’t
really any extra options for playing the game, but even if there were
the fact that no sane person would want to destroys any chance of
replay value.
Do not buy this game. Do not attempt to seriously play this game. If
you’re ever in a position where you can try it for free play a couple
minutes to make you appreciate other games more, but that’s it. I don’t
care if you’re five years old, if you’re the parent of a five year old,
if you love Wiffle Ball, or if you see this game for under a dollar;
don’t buy this game. There is no absolutely no value in it, avoid at
all costs.
Article by: KI Simpson
Posted on: Jul. 7th, 2007 |
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Review Recap |
| Gameplay |
| Manages to be needlessly confusing and tediously simplistic at the same time. |
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Graphics |
| Colorful, but clichéd and unimaginative in every way. |
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Sound |
| Repetitive and unnoticeable. |
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Replay Value |
| You'll never finish it in the first place anyway, playing it again would just be insanity. |
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Comments |
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July 7, 2007 |
Symphony1125 |
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Are you serious?... It seems horrible that they would actually put money into making a game like this in the first place let alone think that they would make any profit off of it... fucking rubbish...
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